Doctor, doctor, I keep losing my memory.
When did you first notice it?
When did I first notice what?
Doctor, doctor, these pills you gave me for BO are no use.
What's wrong with them?
They keep slipping from under my arms.
I went to the doctor, it was quite serious. He gave me 6 months to live. But when I couldn't pay his bill he gave me another 6 months.
A boy called the doctor..
"Doctor, doctor come quick, my younger brother has just swallowed my pen."
"I'll be right over - what are you doing in the meantime?"
"I'm using a pencil..."
Doctor, doctor, I feel like a 10 Dollar note
Well go and buy something then, the change will do you good.
The doctor comes in and tells his patient he has some good news and some bad news, the good news is that you don't have cancer, the bad news is that you have short- term memory loss. Then the patient says, "But do I have Cancer?"
A man walks into the doctors, he says 'doctor doctor, I think I'm a moth.' The doctor replies, 'Well I think you need a physciatrist not a doctor, why did you come to me?'
'Well' then man replies, 'I was walking past your surgery and your light was on.'
Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress, and I keep losing my temper with people.
Doctor: Tell me about your problem.
Patient: I JUST DID, DIDN'T I, YOU STUPID IDIOT!
My dad went to the doctor. He said, 'I think I'm an elastic band.'
The doctor said, 'Stretch yourself out on the couch.'
'Doctor, :doctor, I think I must be invisible. Everyone ignores me.'
'Next, please.'
DOCTOR" The pain in your right leg is caused by old age.
OLD MAN : But my left leg is the same age and that doesn't hurt.
A man walked through the door and said "Doctor! Doctor! I think I've gone blind!" and the other man said "you surely have mate, this is a restaurant."
Patient: Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs.
Doctor: I know we had to cut off your arms.
Doctor, Doctor, I keep thinking that I'm a bridge.
Now then, what's come over you?
Two cars and a truck.
Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a pack of cards.
Sit down and I'll deal with you later.
"Doctor, doctor, every time I drink a cup of coffee I get a sharp pain in my nose."
"Have you tried taking the spoon out of the cup?"
Doctor, doctor! I feel like a sheep.
That's baaaaaad.
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